Jun

05

2013

Because He Loves Me {Construction School for Wives}

Construction School / Marriage / The Gospel / Writing  Posted by / 1 comments

Sisters, I don’t want to start Construction School without making one thing very loud and clear about our motivation here.

No matter how hard we work, we will never be “good enough” as wives.

I’m not sure how you’re reacting to that statement.  But I can imagine a range of responses like:

  • I’m going to prove you wrong.  I will be good enough. Watch me work.  (pride, self-righteousness)
  • I already knew this was pointless. Our marriage will never change. (hopelessness)
  • I’m a failure before I start.  This is so typical. (guilt, condemnation)
  • Yes! This is so true. (gospel)

Only when we turn to Christ is their any hope for our marriages whatsoever.

If our motivation for building our marriages is anything other than our Savior’s love for us, than we have failed before we began.  Your motivation might look great from the outside: “I want the world to see what a God-honoring marriage looks like.” Or it could be less noble: “I just want him to pick up his socks and put them in the hamper,” or “I want to feel loved.”

But the only person in the world who will fulfill all our desires is not our husband; it’s Jesus Christ.  <— Click to Tweet

The God who became man, lived a perfect life because you (and I!) could not, walked willing to a death that you deserved, and rose again so that you will never walk alone is the only one who can fulfill all our desires.  He is the only one who loves us perfectly.  And the good news is that you don’t have to do anything to make Him love you other than believe in His sacrifice for your sake and glory in His love.

We shouldn’t be motivated to build our marriages by pride, guilt, condemnation, a desire to do right, or perfectionism. Those motivations will all land us in the same place: trusting in ourselves or despairing.

The only motivation that can truly spur us to love our husbands is the love of Christ. 

When we truly know how much God loves us despite every wrong thing we’ve ever done, when we understand that because of the work of Jesus Christ at the cross God sees us as if we have never done anything wrong, and when we feel that the Holy Spirit will always walk with us, encouraging and empowering us with the love of God, then that understanding of His love overflows into how we love others.  Because He loves us, our hearts toward our husbands can be changed.  And when our inevitable moment of failure comes, we can run to the cross and then to our husbands with an apology.

So, sisters, let’s check our hearts before we begin this series.  Let’s preach each other the gospel in the comments.  And let us not be proud of our own accomplishments or defeated by our own failures.  The team writing these posts is putting in hours of research, prayer, work, and mostly failure, but know that each of us are falling on our face each day in joy for the love of our heavenly Father who sent His Son to die a death we deserved because He loves us so much.

Jun

04

2013

Camera Lenses: Recommendations and Buying

Beginner Photography Class / Lenses  Posted by / 0 comments

There are so many choices when it comes to buying lenses that it’s almost overwhelming.

Camera Lenses

We’ve studied the difference between prime (fixed focal length) and zoom lens as well as the effects that focal lengths have on images.  Hopefully, you have a sense for which focal lengths compliment your style/subjects as well as whether you crave zoom or prime lenses.  In this post, we’ll learn about what additional factors you should consider before purchasing a new lens.

Why Your Lens is More Important than your Camera

As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been using a SonyAlpha 200.  The camera itself is a terrible professional camera.  There is noise like crazy above ISO 400, the megapixels are only slightly better than a high-end Android or Iphone camera, and there are a ton of other limitations with this beginner grade camera body.

Yet, I’m shooting pro quality images on a camera most pros would consider just above the level of junk.  How?  I’m using quality prime (fixed focal length) lenses.  We’ve already talked about how prime lenses are sharper than even the best zoom lenses and that’s a huge part of my success with this camera body.  My lenses were all bought used or “open box”, yet each of them is far better quality than any ‘kit’ lens that might come with your camera.

So let me dust off my kit zoom lens (f/3.2-5.6 18-70mm zoom) and shoot the same scene with it and both my primes all other settings the same and let you compare the results.

Kit vs Prime

Get real close to your monitor and look at the details in these two images.  Especially with that top set of leaves and the speckling on the flower petals, do you see how the bottom image has more defined borders around these small parts? Do you see the difference between the veining in those top leaves?

Let’s explore some things you want to see in your lenses to make your investment count before you consider purchasing a new one.

Why Purchase a Fast Lens?

A fast lens is one who has a very wide aperture.  Remember how wider apertures let in more light? When wide open, these lenses can capture an image with a much faster shutter speed than a lens with a wide open aperture of f/4 or so.  

Aperture ranges from 1.2-2.8 are generally fast lenses.  On a prime lens f/1.2 to f/1.8 is pretty standard as the fastest.  On a zoom lens, usually the fastest you can get is f/2.8.

Fast lenses (especially the zooms) cost a fair bit more than their slower counter parts.  Why is it worth it to spend more? Because creating an aperture that opens as wide as 2.8 is a very intricate process, fast lenses generally also have quality builds, quality glass, and a larger number of elements.  Finally, apertures 2.8 and greater produce the beautiful blurred background bokeh that’s so popular.

What Lenses should I Invest in First?

I’m not a know it all in this area of lenses, but there are two lenses I would recommend as your first lens purchase after your kit lens depending on both your sensor size and your primary subjects (as discussed in our lesson on focal lengths).

I would recommend a 30mm or 35mm f/1.7 to f/2.8.  All of the most popular SLR manufactures have one of these right around $200-300 new.  On a crop sensor  this focal length is about the same as what our eyes see naturally. Objects in your images will look roughly the same size as you perceive them to be in real life.  It’s great for landscapes, half or full body portraits, group shots, smaller rooms, and some macro work (depending on your lens). I use my 30mm almost exclusively for newborn and macro imagery (because my 30mm is a macro lens). Sometimes I pull it out to capture toddlers who like to be near me when I photograph them and I use it frequently in homes where I need to be closer to my subject than I prefer because of the size limitations of the room.

The second lens I would recommend is a 50mm f/1.7 or f/1.8.  This lens runs from about $150-200 new.  On a crop sensor this is more zoomed in than your normal vision. This is a fantastic lens for capturing details, portraits of 1-4 people, closer landscapes, and for avoiding distortion in portraits.  I use my 50mm to put some distance between myself and portrait subjects most frequently (No adult wants me 2-3 feet away for a head shot… that’s just uncomfortable).  However, of my two lenses it’s the faster one… so I also pull this one out whenever my lighting drop is very minimal as well as for the yummy bokeh that the f/1.7 aperture creates .

Either of these two lenses will give you a feeling for “focusing on your feet” with a prime lens as well as the difference between a fast and slow lens. Additionally, you’ll get a feel for whether you would eventually prefer a wider or more telephoto focal length; and if you love the focal length, you’ll learn that you’re willing to invest in the pricier f/1.2 or f/1.4 version of that lens.

At the end of this post I’ll feature affiliate links to these two lenses on Amazon for you to look at by your specific manufacturer.  As a full disclosure: I wouldn’t recommend these lenses if I hadn’t done the research on them (or used them) and I only receive money from these links if you purchase something while on Amazon.

If you have a ton of extra cash flow or have both of the above lenses, the following are lenses are what I would recommend you researching and choosing between based on the images you most enjoy creating.

Prime Lenses:

24mm f/1.4 up  to f/2.8

85mm f/1.2 up to f/2.8

90mm or 100mm Macro f/2.8

Zoom Lenses (these cost more than the average camera body! eek!):

24-70mm f/2.8

70-200 f/z.8

Where Can I get Quality Lenses?

First, here’s a handy Cheat Sheet on reading the number on your lenses before your purchase.

Next, I’d recommend staying with your camera manufacturers lenses with a few exceptions. Tamron and Sigma make pretty good zoom and fixed focus Macro lenses that are compatible with the top three (Canon, Nikon, Sony, and sometimes Olympus).  Also, one of the deciding factors in purchasing Sony for me was that I could purchase extremely inexpensive and high quality used Minolta Auto Focus lenses.  For Sony users this is sometimes very lucrative: I bought my 50mm f/1.7 for $50.  (There’s my one and only Sony plug. Ha!).

You can purchase lenses new at a local shop (call first for availability), your camera’s manufacturer website, or Amazon.

However, I’d highly recommend shopping used especially for the 30 or 35mm or 50mm.  You can often save quite a bit buying used or ‘open box’ and sacrifice very little on quality (you might find marks on the outside of the lens, for example). Some used stores even give free warranties. Stay in the like new to excellent- categories to make sure you don’t have problems.  I struggle with sites like Ebay, especially if the seller is out of the country and doesn’t offer a money back guarantee.  However, I have purchased from Craigslist (and would again): bring your camera and your laptop if you own one for a bigger view of the images, and meet in a public place.  A little research may also find manufacturer-specific enthusiast forums with private buy/sell/trade areas and for those looking for something specific forums might be well worth the try (I just bought an a77 camera body off a Sony Specific forum!).

If you’re going used (most have new as well) online, try the following sites (not affiliate links):

www.keh.com

www.bhphoto.com

www.adorama.com

What Should I look for in Buying Used?

If you’re taking the chance on a used lens not from one of these reputable sites (maybe from Ebay, Craigslist, a forum, or a personal friend), make sure to evaluate then lens as soon as you get it.  Here’s a very basic list of what to look for:

  • Lens outside may have some scratches or surface wear but no dings or dents which would indicate a fall.
  • Nothing should rattle around inside the lens.
  • Zoom lenses should zoom smoothly without catching.
  • Aperture should stop down and up throughout the full range. Check images on your LCD screen after you’ve taken them.  Your focusing screen will always show the wide open aperture unless you’re using a DSLT, but I’d still check on the screen even if I did have a DSLT. Better yet, upload the images to a computer to evaluate if you can.
  • Front and back glass should be free from scratches or haziness on visual inspection.  Some dust like spots are okay and shouldn’t effect your lens quality.

Final Thoughts On Lenses

Find what you love and use it.  Some of you will find you’re a prime lens lover.  Others will prefer a zoom lens.  Some of you might like a little of both. That’s okay!  Enjoy learning situations that call for a certain type of lens (zooms for a wedding party) or certain focal lengths (18-24mm for a very wide view).

Play with lens distortion for fun. I love this old snap of Sedryn simply because the lens distortion makes it that much more hysterical (or pitiable if you’re a more compassionate type)!

Sedryn

Oh, and it’s worth it to rent an expensive lens before purchasing it for yourself!

Specific Lens Recommendation Links

In alphabetic order so no particular manufacturer enthusiast gets their feelings hurt :-p (and including Pentax with the big three because one of our classmates shoots Pentax).  With Canon and Nikon some lenses are only functional on a crop sensor.  Most of you will do fine with that lens, but if the idea of ever upgrading to a full frame sensor camera appeals to you, do your research and order the lens compatible with a full frame camera body.  I think most of the following are crop-specific lenses… but I’m not really sure.

Canon

Canon EF 35mm f/2
Canon EF 50mm f/1.8

Nikon

Nikon 35mm f/1.8G AF-S 
Nikon 50mm f/1.8D AF Nikkor Lens
Nikon 50mm f/1.8G AF-S NIKKOR FX

Pentax

Pentax 21987 DA 35mm f/2.4
Pentax DA 35mm f2.8 Macro Lens
Pentax DA 50mm f1.8 lens

Sony

Sony 30mm f/2.8 Macro (I have this one)
Sony 35mm f/1.8
Sony 50mm f/1.8
Minolta 50mm f1.7 AF Lens (I have this one)

Let me know if these recommendations help you (or your spouse… hint hint) make a purchase.

May

29

2013

Construction School for Wives

Construction School / Marriage  Posted by / 2 comments

I glimpse the mess again as I glance through the window.

How the pole had just come crashing down moments after we’d hung all the clothes. Dry rot sent the whole mess tumbling down.

Dry rot.

Julia and I, we had talked long about dry rot when she was here.

We had used a different name: bitterness.

About how the bitterness seizes you and grows silently within. And then the hollowness, the lack of affection, the truth-less thoughts suddenly take you all by surprise.

And a marriage can tumble down when just one more thing happens, like that last wet and heavy dress hung there on the line.  (<– Click to Tweet) That hollow dry rotting core brings the whole thing down. Everything just snapping.

The wisest of women builds her own house, but folly with her own hands tears it down. Proverbs 14:1

I don’t pretend to know how to build my own house: my marriage and my children.  I’m good at snapping.  At watching everything fall there on the ground, dirty and half wet.  I know how to tear a house down and I can do that naturally and immediately.

But I have learned one thing from that fallen clothesline:

It’s the cross that keeps standing.  The cross that everything hangs on.  If I can just cling to the cross and train for His calling, then I can learn to build my own house.

Construction School for Wives

How do we build up our houses rather than tear them down?

For the past year this post has sat in my drafts folder waiting for me to obey God.  My courage is weak, but His power will be seen through that weakness.  So I’m submitting to Him and I don’t know where it will lead.

Four other women have joined me to commit to soaking in the word of God on a topic that is a struggle for us in our marriage, training to build up our husbands and marriage in that area for a month, and then writing on the experience for you each Wednesday.  Our hope is that God will transform our marriages and yours through our transparency into doors and windows to the Gospel.  But mostly, I suspect that He will change our own hearts to be more like his.

Meet the Team of Writers

Let me introduce the ladies who will be joining me here at Quiet Graces for this series.

Elizabeth

Wife to Bob.  Mom of 3.  A sweet Pennsylvanian encourager who I met through Holley Gerth’s God Sized Dream Team.  I noticed her because Sedryn and her boy Adam were totally rocking the same blond curly hairdo. 🙂  Elizabeth is a professional writer and also creates art prints with scripture on them.  She’s currently writing an incredible series on how creativity occurs in the most unlikely point of our lives: motherhood. Spark Mom is the series title.

What you’re going to appreciate most about Elizabeth is her ability to share her failures in a way that makes you feel normal.  As we’ve been working away on this series over the last month, Elizabeth was always the one to quickly admit that she was struggling too.

Elizabeth is most likely the only one in this group of ladies who can do a headstand while looking so ridiculously relaxed (she might be the only one of us who can do a headstand).

Danielle

Wife to Adam. Mom of 4 under 6. Danielle does not currently blog, but feels a tug on her heart telling her that He may be calling in that direction.  She’s scared out of her mind over writing for this series. Danielle is a dear real life friend who I’ve only come to know very well in the past 4 months. We’ve bonded over the tears of desperate introverted moms who just want a few minutes of peace yet are being refined by the little people in our house.  It’s almost painful to see the amount of sin these little people drag up from our hearts!

What you’re going to appreciate most about Danielle is her honest struggle against perfectionism. She grew up in a home where appearances were more important than the heart (I think many of us can relate in one way or the other), and I feel like she’s learning to give herself grace for being a human who fails.  Ah, but walking with her as she learns this lesson is so encouraging to me when I find myself struggling through the same thing.

Danielle lives in a small house and disappears into the bathroom for good cries, good prayer times, and just a moment of peace (like most moms I know).

Sarah

Wife to Lee. Mom of 1 sweet girl named Emma who has fought a long journey growing from severely autistic to low spectrum autism in her 7 years.  Sarah was a crazy ring leader in my college dorm and my chaplain at one point.  We used to run together when we got stressed (I hate running… so let me tell you that was all love).  Sarah has a really unique perspective for this series because she has struggled through a heart wrenching biblical divorce with her first husband.

What you’re going to love most about Sarah is how she values her Savior’s love.  He was there for her through some difficult years filled with abandonment and sorrow but has now learned God fills all crevices of a broken heart and that there’s a season for everything and that relationship always inspires me to seek Him more.

Sarah secretly would like to would like to climb to the highest mountain and be completely transparent but she’s a little scared about what some of us would think.

Julia

Wife to the hysterical Brad. Mom of 3 girls 3 and under.  Julia and I met through blogging our journeys with baby twins. I felt called to encourage her and that encouragement led to some partnering on our blogs: most notably our True Beauty Series.  Which lead to us reading Sacred Sex together. A year and a half after our relationship began, Julia’s husband surprised her with a week visit with me.  We moved from screen friends to in real life friends. I’m blessed to know her.

What you’re going to love most about Julia is her sense of humor coupled with the truths she’s learning. She’ll be the first to admit that she can’t even manage to weed her gorgeous and humongous garden during this season of her life, but her learning of her limitations is teaching her that she is enough in Christ.  And that’s a perspective we all need.

I’ll nominate Julia for the one mostly likely in this group to have both hand sanitizer, baby wipes, diaper cream, and fabulously stylish sunglasses on her person at all times.

 

Will you Join as We Train to Build our Marriages?

A little construction school for wives?  Cling with me to the cross?

We’d love to hear your thoughts on this series.  Has your marriage experienced seasons of dry rotting bitterness? Do you find it more natural to tear down your house than to build it up?  What area do you feel like you need God to do the most transforming work in your marriage?

List of Posts in this Series

May

28

2013

{Free Beginner Photography Class} 6 Month Student Reviews

Beginner Photography Class  Posted by / 1 comments

So I’m going to take a post just to brag on my Free Beginner Photography Class here at the halfway point of the class.  Plus I really want each of them to hear and really see how much they’ve grown over the past few months.  I’m really blessed by these 6 people who’ve participated almost weekly for the past half year and the seventh who just joined this weekend.

I’ll talk about each of these folks in alphabetical order.  You’ll see one of the first images they posted for January’s assignment, then read the mission statement they’ve crafted for the Storytelling with Images Series, and finally see a sampling of their most recent work with some words of encouragement for me.  Finally, we’ll have a little blurb about the itinerary for the next 6 months of this series.

Prepare to feast your eyes on the beauty this class is making.

Amanda

micah at one month old, sooc

I want to capture raw emotional interactions between families and couples in a way that pulls away from the technicalities of a picture and pulls into one of the most important aspects of a memory: Love.

my boys
kelvin 6000

I want to capture raw emotional interactions between families and couples in a way that pulls away from the technicalities of a picture and pulls into one of the most important aspects of a memory: Love.

Amanda is a budding professional photographer that I’m privileged to know in real life. I’d met her in a few local photographer meetups before, but really got to know her in December when she hired me to do newborn photographs of Micah.  Let me tell you something about Amanda: when she jumps into something, she’s all in!  She’s spent more hours researching and practicing photography in the last month than I have spent in the past six months writing these posts. I was completely flattered that Amanda chose to jump into my beginner class at all!

Amanda, thank you for joining this class.  Your knowledge and thoughtful critique has blessed the others so much. Your biggest areas of growth are white balance and lighting coupled with the passion of finding your voice. I’m so excited to see you create and begin to work toward your mission statement with your art.  Keep challenging me as I teach and asking questions.  And if you find yourself passionate enough to teach on a particular topic, I’d be honored to have you as a guest poster in this series!

Amber

Inside Shot. ISO 1600

I want to capture the beauty of this earth and the love, emotion, and every day interactions of my family and those around me.

Beginners Photography Class {Rule of thirds}
Beginners Photography Class {Leading Lines}
Beginners Photography Class {Angles}

 

Amber is one of my truest beginners.  She only knew how to use auto mode when she jumped in at the beginning. The difference between her make-up image and the second image I’ve featured of her daughter Bri is incredible! The difference in lighting, intentional composition, emotion, angles… it’s huge!

Amber, you have grown so much through diligence and both giving and receiving critique.  Your faithfulness despite your hard season with a 3 year old and infant is truly paying off.  Your children will have beautifully recorded memories.  I want to encourage you to get these memories into albums.  Buy a template compatible with PSE and get on it.  But most of all, thank you for sending me little words of encouragement through both Facebook and email.  There were days when I pushed through writing a post when I really wanted to give up, all because I knew you were counting on it.  Your words have made a difference in my life.  Thank you.

Andrew

Cliff House, 101

To capture beauty as the eye sees it, and as the imagination remembers it.

Old foundationPP,WR 006 copy
angles 064 Grand daughter reading Calvin and Hobbs
flowers WR 024 copy Leading lines

Andrew is my Father-in-Law and his primary subject with a camera has always been primarily birds with a secondary emphasis on anything in the created world.  His desire to learn photography grew naturally from his passion for bird watching.

Andrew, I appreciate that you’ve joined this class.  Most of all I appreciate the time I know you’re investing in this class both reading the post and writing critique for others.  I know reading and writing are not things that come easily to you, but you’ve grown in both areas through this class.  Way to go!  I appreciate your honest critique whether you like an image or not.  I also appreciate your dedication in learning the craft even though it’s hard.

Jessica

shutter assignment #1 ISO:100, shutter:1/15

I want to capture life in all its fullness and diversity. I want to encapsulate memories just as
they happened and capture the uniqueness of each individual.

Mission statement: I want to capture life in all its fullness and diversity. I want to encapsulate memories just as they happened and capture the uniqueness of each individual.

Triptych 2-ballerina and her tools
Triptych-1- a ballerina and her tools

Jessica is an in real life friend whose sweet husband surprised her with her SLR in February 🙂  She jumped in a little late and has caught up beautifully.  So, like Amber, Jessica is a true beginner in the fullest sense.  It seems every time I run into her around town, she has her camera strung over her should practicing while herding her four beautiful children.

Jessica, I’m loving watching your eye develop.  Your biggest addition to this class is the overwhelming humility with which you receive and give critique.  You’re eager to learn and grow and even I find that encouraging. As you’ve grown, I can see that you’re changing from a mom rushing to capture the moment to an intentional photographer mom with the patience to think about and compose a shot with intention.  I love seeing that growth and am excited to see where December will find you.

SarahBeth

Crepuscular Rays

To capture everyday objects from a unique perspective and find the beauty in the mundane.

Spring Blossoms - Shade Mode
Street Lamp
Red door
Colors in Motion

 

Right from the beginning of this class I could see that Sarah has an eye for detail. How cool are those rays streaming through the clouds on her very first submitted image.  I find it amusing that her mission statement reveals this even more.

SarahBeth, I like the way you see the world.  I like how you find beauty in the mundane and cause me to stop and stare at it in wonder.  I need that so much in my season of life.  Thank you for your encouragement to keep at the writing and assistance over the past few months.  In the next six months, I’d love to see you push yourself to use the camera in places where you would ordinarily leave it at home: the theater, the movies, or just to document a mundane day.  I love your vision and can’t wait to see you flesh it out.

Teddy

Lindy Hopping

 I want to capture and communicate the potential of what is now broken, and inspire others with ability to fix rather than throw away.
Or Isaiah 58:12 And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places; thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in.

Immaculate Perception
The Building
The Thrill of Victory

Dance Floor

Teddy really might be teacher’s pet. Ha! :-p  Early on he noticed a weakness in my ability to both photograph and write for posts while my toddlers fought through the winter season sicknesses so, he volunteered himself  to take some of the images that I couldn’t at that time.  That gesture made sure that this class had quality content as well as quality imagery.  I’m so grateful. I also just love how this haunting last image totally fleshes out his mission statement.

Teddy, the first thing I’ve noticed about your imagery was that it was distinctive.  I couldn’t really put into words at the beginning of the class why, but now that I had a chance to get to know your engineer brain, the thing that really makes you stand out might just be your precision. Part of that is that your subjects are most often still life or landscape.  But even if you were able to photograph people on a regular basis, I imagine you critically looking at every aspect of the image you want to create and analyzing every last iota.  I’d love to see what you could do through fine art portraiture with that brain of yours (although I’m not sure it would appeal to you with your mission statement).  Thank you for being generous with your abilities and investing in me and this class.  But mostly, thank you for always raising the bar.  For jumping in and really critiquing whenever you had the chance to do so.  For pushing and encouraging me and others to continually critique and grow.  Your sort of like the class glue (in the most flattering way possible) 🙂

Theresa

cad1

Welcome, Theresa!  Thanks for having the courage to jump in at the six month mark of the class and catching up.  We look forward to helping you grow!

Free Beginner Photography Class Itinerary

So here’s what I’ve planned to cover in the next six months.

  • 1 more post on lenses next week
  • 3-5 weeks learning to use manual mode
  • 1-2 posts on nailing focus in your images
  • 4-8 posts on lighting (natural available light only with some mention of using reflectors and when to use your on-camera flash)
  • 1 post on the difference between RAW and JPEG modes and when I recommend each
  • 1 post helping class members to choose a final class portfolio project
  • 1 overview post on the pros and cons of the most popular editing software
  • 4-5 posts on very basic edits  (brightness, contrast, levels/curves, healing/cloning, color/white balance adjustments, sharpening, and preparing for web)
  • 1 post where users of different editing software will apply the same basic edits to one image with screenshots for the visual learners (Hopefully, Amanda and Teddy will help me out here)
  • Remaining post days will have some step by step screen shot recipes for what I do to various images with editing software
  • 1 Final post presenting the year end portfolio projects from class members

If you guys feel like there’s anything I missed on this planning list or if there’s something you’d really like covered, then please tell me in the comments section of this post or drop me an email to let me know.

May

24

2013

When Dreaming is Riskiest

Writing  Posted by / 2 comments

Working with Holley Gerth’s God-Sized Dreams Team this last 6 months has been a wild ride.  I have made some great blogging connections, I’m able to participate in a prayer group weekly, and most of all I feel like my own dream has begun to form itself in new and wonderful ways.  I’m actually not sure I would have been able to answer the following questions before being invited to this group.

When Dreams are Riskiest

What part of your dream feels the riskiest?

I’ve learned that I actually have two dreams and both are intertwined.  I want to photograph and write about how the everyday chaos are truly the most beautiful moments in life. The riskiest parts for me are therefore twofold as well.

On the photographer side, my riskiest moments are anytime I work with a client. Ha!  I’m a pretty extreme introvert around new-to-me people (though I’m pretty loud once you get to know me!).  So making that initial pre-session consult phone call, communicating my photography vision to clients, greeting clients as they arrive, and then sitting down for the ordering session where clients see the bulk of their images for the first time pretty much throws me way beyond my comfort zone.

On the writer side, my riskiest moments are digging deep enough to have anything publishable.  I can really run to the preachy side of things (I’m a natural leader/teacher), but to really dig deep from the dirt of my own everyday mess to share with you my own sin and God’s glory in those moments…. Some weeks I just can’t even bring myself to do it at all.  Being faithful in this area is very difficult.

Have you ever had people misunderstand or disagree with your dream?

As a Myers Briggs Introvert/Intuition/Thinking/Judging (INTJ), I feel misunderstood every time I share my dreams.  As a natural thinker/judger, I just assume everyone thinks like I do and have judged and categorized my dream even if they’re completely different personality types.  And even though that’s my natural bent, I hate being stuck in a category (ha!).

There are moments on the photography side where I feel like I cause huge disagreements with my pricing: I have priced myself to make around $9-11 an hour and I know that can often make me seem expensive.  I’m happy to refer potential clients to another photographer (if they give me their budget), but I really feel fairly priced. So there’s a lot of insecurity around pricing.

As the girl who just taps the keys here on this blog hoping to be used to change the world (or really just one soul), I’m not sure I’m even yet able to verbalize the writing part of the dream yet except to my husband and closest friend.  I’m scared to verbalize it because I really don’t want to be misunderstood.

What do you do when your dream is scary or when others don’t support you?

I’ve come to this place in the last 6-9 months where I feel pretty confident that my job is simply obedience.  God calls me to this writing/photographing/child-rearing season and all I’m supposed to do is faithfully show up and do the next step.  So when the dream is scary I just do the next step.  But also as a strong-willed introvert, the support of others isn’t usually an area where I struggle too much (although there are days where I do!).

But either way… I’m not responsible for the results.  I’m only responsible for my obedience.  God’s in charge of the results. (<—Click here to Tweet this) So I’ll just keep plugging along day by day and minute by minute to see what He’s working.  I hope you’re brave enough to join me.